Ty Wilson - Female Abstract Nude
Last night I was reading a book about how our moods actually alter the state of our cells. How, more than any other factor, being happy or sad, increases our chances of health or disease. It occurs to me that if you have grown up in an alcoholic or otherwise dysfunctional environment, you have a better chance of feeling unhappy, and a harder job of not feeling that way.
I have become so used to living on the edge of my seat (with adrenaline pumping through my veins) or in fear of what is going to happen next or in pain from the latest abandonment, that my body doesn’t seem to care that my chaotic childhood isn’t my currently reality. Even though I have made wholesale changes in every area of my life and I am applying my steps to my daily life, I feel a little bit low on lust for life, and am generally quite miserable at the moment. I have just recovered from an ear-throat infection.
I get the sense that my body is not supporting my new found pockets of serenity and my great progress in the 12 Step Program. Even when I have good news on the work front, with great opportunities arising, I tend to revert to worrying (which I’m very good at).
Seth Godin put’s it in plain English:
Worrying is not a useful output. Worrying doesn’t change outcomes. Worrying ruins your day. Worrying distracts you from the work at hand. You may have fooled yourself into thinking that it’s useful or unavoidable, but it’s not. Now you’ve got one more thing to worry about.
via Seth’s Blog: When is it okay to start worrying?
I think that the hopeful answer to this, is to be vigilantly aware of my thoughts, to adjust the ones that don’t support my happy, abundant life and to step up looking after my body with good food, sufficient sleep and exercise. Maybe it is time to spend as much time, rehabilitating my body, as I have spent on my mind and moods.
My Recovery in 12 Steps 